Wednesday 3 February 2010

23 Family Affair

It's been all about a boy recently, so I was looking forward to my friend visiting from Holland for some girlie time. We were going to paint each other's nails, have pillow fights in our underwear and talk about shopping and periods. Just the usual.

This is where you realise I'm lying, because you all know Fishy loves a bit of menstrual cycle chat and you probably think I'm all talked out on that particular subject.

Anyway, we were having a lovely weekend and while sitting drinking cocktails one afternoon, Lego moved the conversation on to my blog. (As an aside, my friend may live in Holland, but she is actually from Denmark and for some reason wasn't keen on my suggestion to refer to her as the Great Dane. She wanted to be called Lego. Something about how people enjoy playing with it..)

'I presume you have exaggerated some of the dates you've been on?'

'Sadly, I actually haven't.'

'You must have. Some of the guys sound like arseholes. They can't really exist can they?'

Ah, spoken like a true Attached Person. Internally I rubbed my hands with glee.

You see we were going out that night and I knew that I wouldn't have to do a thing. I could just sit back and relax and the weirdos would come to us. Lego would never doubt the accuracy of my blog again. The men out in Manchester wouldn't let me down.

And they didn't. Step forward Mr Cliche...

This is the guy that approaches you and asks if you and your friend are related. Or in this case, it was more like...

'Ello booootiful laydeeezz. You are seesters yesss? Yesss you must be seesters. You ave thee same boooootiful face.'

Now this happens to me all the time. Taggart and I are forever getting it. Either I'm a shapeshifter and can transform myself to look like whatever friend I'm out with, or guys think it is a good line.

In this case I'm sure it was all about the latter, because Lego and I look nowt alike. She is all blonde and nordic, whereas I'm dark and, if I believed everything I'm told, look a bit Spanish, Thai, Chinese, Indian and like Elvis.

To be fair to the guy though, we are both female so he probably had a point.

'Yes we are sisters' we tell him.

No, I don't know why we were encouraging him either.

'I knew theess. You are tweeens yesss?'

'Yes we are.'

Taxi for Lego and Rapunzel.

Well, at this point you would have thought we had just told him he'd won the lottery. His expression suggested all his Christmasses had come at once. He clearly felt sure that he was 'in'.

I really, really, really don't understand this.

Not only because this guy looked like Danny DeVito. But shorter. He probably didn't get much opportunity to be 'in' anywhere, very often. Particularly with twins.

More because like I said, this has happened before. After replying in the affirmative when a Greek barman asked Taggart and I if we were twins, we got an invitation to his home. And he certainly didn't just want us to taste his moussaka.

Now it seemed that Mr DeVito's thoughts were heading along the same tangent.

Do twins ever actually do this?

Do they enjoy a bit of tete´-a-tete´-a-tete´?

What about sisters? Do they?

Only having a male sibling, I've no idea. It was bad enough when I borrowed an old phone of his and found texts on it from a girl saying exactly what she wanted to do to him. Eurgh, that's my brother!!! Minging.

If anyone has any thoughts on/experience in, this matter then feel free to let me know.

It certainly gives a new dimension to the term 'spending time with the family.'


Plentymorefishoutofwater said...

A very good read, that. Maybe Lego can come on our second date? We can talk about periods before moving on to a naked pillow fight?

Unknown said...

yet another bloke looking for a great pair...your right they are all the same...And who mentioned NAKED pillow fight by the way????

Kiwi said...

Plentymorefishoutofwater - you couldn't
handle these 'twins' in a pillow fight, naked
or otherwise.
Lego is catwomen with a blond hairdo.
Together with Betty Boop,
they're a hard act to follow.

Aion said...

Hi Rapunzel
I have an Award for you over at
(not everyone can post an award - I know - but it's the thought that counts :)

Ca88andra said...

I really think you should have played along a bit more. Maybe told him you are both professional jelly wrestlers???

Bird on a Wire said...

I once had a guy try to chat me up by telling me I looked like his sister - work that one out!!

Bird x

once_bitten said...

These guys scare me - Not only would it never cross my mind to try 'are you sisters?' as a chat up line, but if two sisters suggested we all get naked together I would feel pretty sick.
Two girls = Awsome!
Sisters = Not so awsome!

Jen said...

I don't get the twin thing, either. A lot of guys seem to have that fantasy, but...eeeew...

Kitty Moore said...

That is gross - what a w**ker!

Kate said...

Firstly, congrats on getting over 100 followers!

Secondly, I know what you mean about the twins thing. One of my friends and I get this ALL the time. Oooh we both have shortish blonde hair therefore we MUST be twins. Er, no. No we're not.

And if we were twins, do blokes really think that we'll both have sex with them AT THE SAME TIME? Yuk. Why would I want to see my sister (not that I actually have a sister) getting porked by a fat Danny De Vito lookalike whilst he grabs my boobs. BIG WORLD OF WRONG!!!

Kate x

Lifestyle Lookbook said...

Haha remember that a family that "plays" together, stays together ;)

ryan said...

Love your post. I've had similar encounters when out with my friends, but the worst situation was with my mother:

hope you enjoy.

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