Monday, 19 April 2010

24 Double Dutch

I've got a girlfriend...

What? I was confused. I re-read the text that I'd just received from Mr Lekker.

The word 'girlfriend' was jumping out at me. Which would be ok if it was following the words 'do you want to be my...'. Instead this was featuring in a sentence that I really didn't want to be seeing. Nor should I be, because I distinctly remembered asking if he was in a relationship and the answer was definitely in the form of a negative.

...I'm really sorry that I lied to you...

Good, at least I wasn't losing my mind. I had asked him.

...I was having such a good time and I didn't want it to end...

Er, this isn't a trip to the fairground we are talking about Mr Lekker.

I jest, but in reality I was absolutely gutted. I felt sick.

For a start it seemed incredibly unfair. I'd been single for...ooh...cough...a while, and felt that I'd been pretty patient. Did Cupid think it would be a good joke to introduce me to someone that well and truly floated my boat, but someone that was already playing port and starboard with someone else?

As well as that, I was annoyed at the fact that I had suddenly become the 'other woman.' That's not a game I ever wanted to play. Apart from all the usual reasons, I believe that I deserve better than being 3rd place in someone's life (in my opinion these men tend to put themselves 1st, and their partners 2nd.)

I would like to say that at this point I just deleted this text, along with his number and carried on with my life. That's not what happened though (of course if you would prefer to think that is what I did do, then please stop reading now and just avoid any post with anything Dutch-related in the title and you will be none the wiser.) No, the rest of his text was so lovely (damn him and his talent for texting!)that I felt compelled to phone him.

There followed a deep and meaningful conversation where we said how strongly we felt about each other. And ended in us deciding to meet up again.

I know, I know! I'm not sure either how in the space of a morning I'd changed from being someone with morals, to Monica Lewinsky.

The chemistry between us had been almost palpable though, and surely if things were that great between him and his girlfriend he wouldn't be calling me most evenings to say goodnight?

The chats and texts continued as normal. We planned when to meet and started discussing where. England or Holland? (Or somewhere neutral like Switzerland?!) I sent him a text about flights I'd seen.

I didn't get a reply. Weird. That wasn't like him at all. Maybe he hadn't received it?

I sent it again. Still no reply.

I sent a different text. Silence.

My male friends often tell me tales of 'psycho' girls that text them repeatedly and just won't take the hint that they aren't interested in them. I nod and agree that these particular women do sound a bit unstable and I assure them that we aren't all like that. Writing this though I realise I was, albeit for a very brief time, one of those girls!!!!

Of course it all could have been avoided if I'd received a message, something along the lines of...

Hey Rapunzel, great meeting you but by the way I've decided not to contact you again.

Fine - at least I'd know where I stood. No such text arrived though so I presumed that Mr Lekker must have lost his phone. Or be in hospital. Or dead. Cause he wouldn't just stop contacting the girl that he said he was falling for would he?

Of course he flipping would! And thankfully I eventually saw the light myself. Not before sending a few 'Loopy Lou' texts unfortunately but hey, I was emotional.

A Dutch friend suggested that I sell my story over there. I decided against it. Mr Lekker may be famous but he isn't exactly Tiger Woods. Plus my 'kiss and tell' would literally be just that - there was no horizontal fun to speak about. I'd be lucky if anyone would pay enough for a portion of frites and mayo for my non-juicy gossip. Also I'm really not that kind of a girl. I'd never dream of telling stories to a load of people about my personal life.

So life continued. I managed to wean myself off watching Mr Lekker on t'internet. I'd practically forgotten he even existed.

Until months and months later my phone rang from a Dutch number. A Dutch number I vaguely recognised...

I couldn't believe it! I also couldn't hear him. I was in Scotland visiting the parents, in the home of crap phone reception.

I tried everything. Moving to different rooms. Hanging out windows. Apart from the odd word, I had no idea what he was saying. I hung up. In a strop.

Then a text came through...

I'm in Scotland. Are you? Can we meet?

Yes, and hell yes!

Obviously I didn't write that. I played it a bit cool. Inside my stomach was churning though. I couldn't believe that I was going to see Mr Lekker again!


Plentymorefishoutofwater said...

I'm loving this. And the cliffhangers. Ace. Loved the stuff about you being a psycho texter - something I know all about of course. And the line about you telling personal stories to strangers - good stuff.
*Plentymorefishoutofwater - One Man's Dating Diary*

Wynn said...


Lainey said...

Superb post Missus. I do love a good cliffhanger. I can empathise completely about cheating men and the lure that some of them seem to possess...

Looking forward to more! x

pserean said...

seeing as how you're not currently with mr. lekker- i have no idea why im getting excited! it's as fruitful as watching that movie about jane austen(anne hathaway and james mcavoy)..when we all KNOW she ends up a spinster
* maudlin sniff*

as for being the Other Woman- i once became one too, did i find out?gf phoned my number, asked who i was....and then spent half and hour moaning about The Shared Idiot whilst i made consoling noises in the background and tried to retreat as gracefully as i could....

Kate said...

Lekker ding ding DING!

I'm so curious to find out who this semi-famous bloke is!

Loving the cliffhangers Rapunzel. I know what you mean about inadvertantly becoming the third person in a relationship. Not good, but easy to slip into when nor thinking straight!

Looking forward to hearing what happens next...

Lifebeginsat30ty said...

Ugh! Wanting his cake and eating it too, now is he? Boys are such wankers sometimes! Especially the ones with these girlfriends they don't seemingly care about. Why would you want someone who treats their woman so shamelessely!

But after all that, I still want to know what happened!


Anonymous said...



Tuppence said...

As someone who has been the Other Woman (and believe me I didn't do it by halves...) I can really, really empathise with this situation. Bah, men can be such idiots - why do we insist on falling for them?

C'mon on, spill the beans on what happened next.


PS. Can't wait for Saturday and the big night out!

Anonymous said...

Well this is going to be a fun read!!!! I can't wait to see what happens. We have all had our versions of Mr. Lekker.

Dater at Large said...

Oh the allure of the unavailable man. This can only end awesomely bad. Can't wait!

Ca88andra said...

What is with men who think they can ignore you when they want to!

Kitty Moore said...

Ok Rapunzel - you have to stop with these cliffhangers - you get me all excited then leave me hanging!

Can we have a teeny clue to Mr Lekker's real identity (pretty please?)


Skypirate said...

is this a lesson in "do what I say not what I do?" =D

Bobby Allan said...

Drats! I've been away and now I'm totally lost on what's going on. Must go back and read.

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